LOST

i really don't know whether is your problem or mine
what can i do...?
friendship is so far for me..
friendship is a long journey for me...

SO WHAT?

obviously i'm not a GOOD FRIEND
say BYE BYE to me la
noobY

BEFORE LONG

呆呆的坐在電腦熒幕的前座
一次又一次地重復着同樣的動作
當我看着你傳給我的電郵時

倔強的淚水變得不再逞強
咸咸的淚水從臉頰劃落至嘴角
努力揚起的嘴角在此刻顯得如此沒落？
表面微笑的謊言不攻自破···

在我們的關系逐漸變得沉默無話的同時
我的心何嘗不是在淌着血？
你可層感受到我眼里的失落？
我自欺欺人的告訴自己這不過是一場美麗的誤會···

心里的痛你可有感覺？
心痛是時間拉遠了我們之間的距離···
心痛是時間掠奪了我們之間的信任···
心痛是時間掠奪了我們之間的默契···
心痛是不知從何時開始變得
就連說話也要透過冷冰冰的電郵才肯流露那一絲的誠懇···
心痛是不知從何時開始我們變得對對方隱瞞···

我們都忘了當初的那份純真，
我以為我會沒什么，
口是心非的說着就讓回憶變成黑白畫面，
對自己我是那么的不坦白，
為什么我們之間出現了一副"心薔"？
阻擋了我們的關懷···

也許，
這是上帝給我們的一場考驗，
現在的上帝肯定在微笑着，
因為上帝才是這考驗中最后的勝利者，
我們不是輸在起跑點，
我們不是輸在時間里，
我們都輸在彼此不再信任了，
我是多么的不愿意看見上帝繼續囂張，
但我卻能夠做什么？

我說過如果有一天當你站在成功的舞臺上時，
我將會坐在觀眾席為你鼓掌，
其實我更想成為在你失落哭泣時為你遞上紙巾的那位，
與你一起承擔失落的痛苦更勝過與你分享你的快樂···
然而我知道，在這個空缺里，
我永遠都只會是一個候補···

我不曾想過要放棄我們之間的這分情義，
只是我累了，
偶爾膽缺的停下腳步，
所以我選擇了逃避，
請再一次原諒我的軟弱···

曾經何時，
千言萬語哽上咽喉，
欲言又止，
再被無情的固執打回肚里···
怎么我們彼此變得如此陌生？
我很抱歉我對你造成的傷害，
也許同時間我也應該感謝你對我的傷害，
你說我們都長大了··
然而長大的定義又在哪里？

淚水再次模糊了視線···
你知道嗎？
有時候選擇離開，只不過是為了不讓你看見我哭泣的臉龐···

TEARER

i admit that i'm a crybaby
but dont know since when i started not to tears front of those stranger axcept my family
it's a bit hard for me to show my weakness front of them no matter how touch they tell and do well
i think most of them around also will be like this right?
i might be more special cause i be concerned about face-saving
my teardrop is more stubborn than myself
SOMEONE said... they cant even know what am i thinking about cause i hide myself well, i over protect myself out of those injure,harm and hurt given by others...
SOMEONE said... i'm sanguine, i got no secret front of them, always living in a happy life, just like a innocent kid that dont know every complicated things out of the world...
you might ask which is the TRUE me, what i going to answer is BOTH also the true me..
i just show the different me in a different situation...
i like to write articles, no matter in what states of affairs, i can write anythings if i got inspiration
so... do not judge my mood through my articles...

WHINY

sorry for neglecting my blog so badly this time
i had NOTHING to blog recently
i got no idea for it
so damn tired about my works recently
somethings messed me up but it is pass
and i cant remember it clearly too
so leave it....

GODNESS

WELL WELL WELL...

I KNOW I NEED TO "KEEP FIT"

ZZZ

MERCI

i cant be selfish because i got no confidence that i can handle it well...
is it a time to say goodbye...?
cant deny that i'm not willing to be part with them
i might be more merciless sometime